shaliniland
  
 
 

2004-04-01 13:41:33
la cuenta por favor

too lazy to get up

i'm back from costa rica! that's not why i haven't been updating (that's just because i suck), but now i have something to blog about! isn't that what vacations are all about? having something to write about? anyway, costa rica was awesome, as was to be expected. random pics below.

before you hear it from anyone else: yes, i fell off a horse. yes, it was hilarious to all that witnessed it. no, i was not hurt, but don't you worry your little head about that. i still maintain that that other devil albino horse charged my horse. my poor discriminated-against brown horse. anyway. in other news, i also went surfing (got up on my first try!) and hiking and swimming and i learned to dodge waves (why didn't anyone ever tell me that before? i've been pummelled my whole life...) and i even learned a little spanish.

lanette, lu and costa rica

i'll leave the rest of the story-telling to lu, who sums it all up nicely in her dos and don'ts email:

the ones who didn't fall

Shalini, Lanette and I just returned from Costa Rica. If you ever visit, I think you might find the following tips helpful...

DO breathe in the fresh air
DON'T breathe in the fresh air in the middle of a sandstorm

DO keep your wet swimsuit on when predicting a return to the water
DON'T keep wet swimsuit on if you mind the smell of mildew

DO pick up a man playing hooky for the evening
DO allow him to pay his way
DO let him serve as a guide
DON'T forget to thank him



DO hike nature trails
DON'T hike boulders in the ocean without water-shoes
DON'T hike boulders in the ocean without water-shoes if you can't swim

DO travel by horseback
DON'T fall off the horse
DO double-check if your friend is ok before laughing hysterically when she (or he!) falls off

DO pick up hitchhikers
DON'T force rides on people who're not asking for one.

DO pack your dirty hiking shoes in a separate compartment
DON'T pack shoes full of horse "mierda" in a separate compartment

If you don't like the attention DON'T: allow the speed-crazy-one to drive the rental; have "story-time" readings on the beach; fall off horses; dress like an "American;" tan one breast more than the other, or ask random people "Are you from Montana?" If you relish in strange looks DO all the previous: mustard on your face, frizzy hair and looking-like a dwarf accentuate the effect.

Just so you know, when you're in another country your wake/sleep schedule might change,your singing voice doesn't improve, and neither does your tolerance for alcohol.

Lu

i'm not good at night photography

little kids are better at riding horses than me

i don't get it either

the giant, the dwarf, and playa conchal

also, max has been gracing us with stories of his adventures in sofia, bulgaria. they are reprinted below. along with this link to bob's take on gay marriage, and news about gmail.

max's story:

A few weeks ago, after I had been in Sofia for three weeks, I decided to try a new internet cafe. I had walked by it often, but my flatmate (Mark) had warned me that it was dark and full of young teenagers screaming as they blew each other away and wholly unsuitable as a place to read notes while writing CELTA essays. So I had never actually entered before.

But I decided to check it out anyway, as it is very close to my apartment. I went in and saw that there was a series of doors. I entered the first and then got buzzed into a tiny room the size of an airplane lavatory. I then had the following conversation with the girl behind the window:

Me: Hello, do you speak English?
Her: Yes.
Me: I'm not sure how things work here. Do I need a membership card?

She looks at me carefully. She is young, with dyed blond hair and green eyes. Kinda cute, but in a skinny heroin-addict kind of way. I have definitely never seen her before in my life.

Her: You are a member.
Me: Umm, I don't think so. I've never been here before.
Her: I remember you.
Me: That's impossible. I definitely have never been here before. You must be confusing me with somebody else.
Her: What is your name?

I start to tell her, but her knowledge of what the English letters are called seems inadequate so she asks me for an ID and I give her my driver's license. She types it in.

Her: I knew it. There you are.

She pivots the flat-screen monitor so I can see it. There is a picture of me wearing the exact same gray striped sweater I was wearing at that moment. I had my face mashed up against the plexiglass, giving a clear and enlarged view up both nostrils. My head was cocked to one side and my tongue was hanging out the other. I looked insane.

Her: You were very drunk.
Me: Umm, yes.
Her: And with a girl.
Me: Umm, yes.

(Long pause. I redden.)

Her: Do you have your membership card?
Me: Umm, no.
Her: That will be 2 lev replacement fee.

She held out a gray card that I instantly recognized as the mystery card I'd been carrying in my wallet for three weeks.

Me: Oh, that one. I do have one of those.

I pull it out and she scanned it. I said thanks. She buzzed open the final door. I heard her laughing as I entered a huge dark room full of computers. I still had no memory of ever having been there before.

I now go to this internet cafe almost every day. It is by far the best around: cheap, fast computers, and 19-inch monitors. I am there right now. And every time I go in I have to see that stupid picture of me.

#

 
 


 
 

so you want more, eh? click away.

02/08

all casual-like

06/07

quiescent

05/07

sleeping with the fishes

04/07

Kurt is up in heaven now.

02/07

Yes, I'm still sitting here in Virginia

01/07

because i can't keep up with the indians in the news
Wiki wiki wiki wak!

12/06

Wherein I lose my ability to capitalize consistently
I don't like canned food.
Death by Bananas and Satire and Irony
running on empty
25% of the time you are on your periodical!
I don't know why.
No, YOU suck

05/06

bachia takes over the world
payal & harnish get married

03/06

pictures pacify the people

12/05

Kalle has a plastic bag in his pocket. There is some pizza in it.

10/05

adventures in surfing
12 hours of driving and... at least i saw a rainbow.

09/05

now is time for cake
can you believe i've actually been to the hall the rikta was at? does that mean i've officially been to too many indian weddings? the hall's in atlanta!

09/06

girls?

09/05

it was to scrape off my old decal

05/05

betchya' never had a client claim to see angels floating over your shoulder
and the photos are even sporadically interspersed with requisite cute boy shots of cat
agreed: engineers are totally cute.
no risk ass

01/05

ross and his golden plan
just because their photos are so much more entertaining/beautiful than mine
sea of heartbreak

12/04

saare jahan se acha
i wanna go-a to goa!
just in case you deleted my email because you thought it was spam

11/04

who's that other guy? how old is that pic? what happened to the essentials? who are you people?
nightswimming
leave our homos alone
boston is f&^$ing cold!
this country has broken my heart
i think my brother is trying to distract me from the pre-election tension by sharing this

10/04

i was trying to be productive today

11/04

cutest pics of three virginians in china EVAR!

10/04

that deb sure is one smart cookie
why does this sound like a beatnik poem to me?

09/04

happy hurricane weekend part IV
That dreamy look in your eye/ Give me a tropical contact high...
we need a flag and a name.

08/04

miami nightlife after the monsoon rains

07/04

finally we are no one

07/07

Lost your IT job? Blame HR and your management. Don't blame India, or Indians.

06/04

a place where everyone is slightly left of center (and ragingly so), urban, and wearing comfortable shoes
i also do not get "hella"
four year old predictions finally come true
anyone want a gmail invite?
ready talent reunion! and a baby.

05/04

these pictures look curiously similar to my costa rica pictures...

04/2004

so yesterday? i saw a movie? it was great?

03/04

la cuenta por favor

02/04

monkey sad
i feel like i owe you
(hello? anyone still there?)

it MUST be big news
congrats kids :)

01/04

send ice. and love.
this will just have to suffice for now

11/03

i think i miss virginia
the truth about our jobs
dia de los muertos
halloweeeeeeeen pics!

10/03

jimmy pop is cute
on so many levels
also, turnpike update from max: human-less coin lanes are gone
this one's for the bostonians
dramatic sigh soon to come
brain cells burning
taking a break from frog-mania
today's new word is mierde
what update?

09/03

know what i need from you?
i'm working too, really
what have i gotten myself into?
surfers and lesbians
an adventure in ordinary life
start reading metafilter already
also, i got a room in miami! now come visit already.
kick it!

08/03

and mefi the movie would be funny
more liberal propaganda for ben
max is bored
who says you can't drink during the day as a regularly employed drone?

07/03

you think i jest
temptation and timing
drinking is funny
i know some of y'all could do this
so, you won't mind when i ignore you?
you will be required by law to at least try to smoke a cigarette
good news
both from mightygirl.net
i love cafepress
more more more links
alas, where is the redesign?
just links, no judgement
is the fucking glass half-empty or half-full?
or maybe i should just move to miami already
but not insane pictures :(
really? republicans have more money? who woulda thunk?
i have a mosquito bite on my butt
i'm back!

06/03

the site, that is
oh my

03/03

someone HAD to mention the oedipal complex
don't ask about the weddings
it's come to this

02/03

did i mention that march is wedding-mania in dc?
i now have no choice but to delve into all my theories on life, proving them using quantum physics
now, i just wonder how i didn't notice until today... (blame it on the snoooow)
today's conversation with my brother
i would be very delighted to be your friend
the lost art of the well-crafted email

01/03

love as politics
cyan is a four-letter word
who screams "widget!" in the throes of passion?
stop me
did i mention that i'm moving out?
soft, female and already corrupted, please

12/02

i agree with "excess"
ow
look who we found!
can you tell i can't concentrate on work today?
ghosts of xmas past
better than you, daily
fyi, i'm not that pharmacy student from u. of toronto
technical difficulties
how itchy is his back anyway?
message to max
die die die
no pun intended
tales of a viking invasion were greatly exaggerated

11/02

out of the whole chaotic cesspool of hate
she said it, not me
and a little frightening
just because i've been feeling somewhat muted lately...
do you realize?
next time i'll go to supercuts
and the proof is only 9 pages long
the morning after
even if you don't celebrate

10/02

i am brown
shalini is by urgent request
basic adult survival
it's a good thing daddy runs the vacuum empire
another reason
hear me? hear me! i need sugar in my tea!
telecommuting spoiled me. bad telecommuting.
vestri matris dat bonus caput capitis
flailing helplessly

09/02

just because their email was so... charming.
couldn't have said it better myself
miss you
thankgawd
it's just a joke. don't get so uppity
like daughter, like mother
i am NOT a hottie
i'm supposed to be working
you put the happy in my ness
you're more bored than i am
wanna' go?
more to come, i'm sure
are you kiddin'? we've already rented out your room...

08/02

dirty kanadians
some links that are keeping me sedate and content for now
lush-o sez wha?
test 2
now, go read "midnight's children"
that's all
it's (a)LIVE!
this is just a test. do not run out of your house screaming. yet.
for all us "bad" indian girls out there
flatulence does exist!

07/02

so my ass is large and i smell funny... it could be worse.
and now for something pleasant
it was all her baby's daddy's fault, really
she claimed it was because of all the flannel
that's below the median
oh, and i went to jersey this weekend. it was fun.
mirandaarielumbriel
i trust the tofu
to all you toe-haters out there...
um, is this what you expected?
still masquerading as a member of the real world
it's pointless to walk when it's past time to run

06/02

guess i'll go eat now
inanity of content reaches an all-time low
anyone remember carmen sandiego?
rock on, nickelodeon
get busy living or get busy dying
what was that? you don't think i'm funny?
another one bites the dust
statement of the day
even a termite wouldn't choke on it o/~
living vicariously thru the sachia
embarrassing him is my job (my 8th personality is a large italian mother)
who knew that jay-z was a trendsetter?
welcome back to virginia

05/02

stir it up
i don't get it
disturbing behavior
bollywood chic, eh? have you seen an indian movie?
skanky like a project chick
the british suck. apparently these pickles don't.
when you have nothing to say...
no, officer. i did NOT call you a fat pig.
is that a new shaliniland in the distance?
sammy, the aspiring supermodel
WAY better than being a reagan-baby
say something reasonably clever
old pictures are only worth a few words
just for micah
don't let your meat loaf.
whether you like it or not
some family trees bear an enormous crop of nuts

04/02

blessed is the homemaker
return of the fratboy
obla-di, obla-da
i be getting sappy in my old age
choose your own adventure
and you thought i was a boy
and it's not even true
don't try to bring logic into this
you could be my sunshine
this IS the über-update
this is not the über-update

03/02

(|)
tracking the progress of injured toes

02/02

not like alanis
it's amazing what a little hindlish will do to you
inexplicable
i've turned into my mother
not that i'd do anything about it, but...
i forgot what i was going to say
why is it so quiet around here?
i'm doing the chicken dance as i write this
i'm pretending to care
pretty!
no new mail
heh
what's purple, green and red and badly misshapen?
someone hath murdered sleep. good for him.
and dubya stands for walker.
more talk | less head
i'm a marketing gimp's dream-come-true
the all new gid show
harumph.
nick loves porn more than me
bend it! bend it!
STANDARD
ONESELF WHOM BE ACTUAL
IS CERTAINLY
FOUND

01/02

oh cameron!
passive aggressiveness and inexplicable frustration
pictures of my world verify its existence
go to sleep, you picture-crazy maniac!
shalini is a riceboy!
ich muß hier verlassen!
"tour of the south" leaves shalini with a vicious rash
pookie goes to charlotte
don't mind us, we're just going to sit here and make out
sammy is my zen master. and he told me not to watch any more of these dumb dating shows.

12/01

2001-12-28 15:50:20
2001-12-25 03:18:53

11/01

2001-11-21 18:47:02
2001-11-16 14:51:47

10/01

2001-10-30 23:10:50
2001-10-22 15:51:11
2001-10-21 23:48:29
2001-10-09 14:19:21
2001-10-01 00:00:00

09/01

2001-09-04 00:00:00

08/01

2001-08-27 00:00:00
2001-08-22 01:00:00
2001-08-22 00:00:00
2001-08-21 00:00:00
2001-08-13 00:00:00
2001-08-01 00:00:00

07/01

2001-07-31 00:00:00
2001-07-18 00:00:00
2001-07-16 00:00:00
 
 

"it is (to describe it figuratively) as if an author were to make a slip of the pen, and as if this clerical error became conscious of being such. perhaps this was no error but in a far higher sense was an essential part of the whole exposition. it is, then, as if this clerical error were to revolt against the author, out of hatred for him, were to forbid him to correct it, and were to say, 'no, i will not be erased, i will stand as a witness against thee, that thou art a very poor writer'."
- søren kierkegaard
(passage gleaned from "seymour, an introduction" by j.d. salinger)



   
 
 
 
 
   
 
   
 
 

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